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An Update of Sorts

First matter of outstanding news that everyone must know.

Sir Pratt and his wife have returned from that far distant island in the Caribean, Puerto Rico. They graced the Alliance headquarters with their presence last night. Which in retrospect, was probably a good thing seeing that everyone else that was in the headquarters was there to see them. Apparently they are a liked couple. Who’d of known?

I believe that we reached the world record for the most people who can fit in the Mooseknuckler Cycling Alliance Headquarter’s kitchen last night. This is significant for a couple of reasons. First, the kitchen is the worst room in the house. And second, because we spent the whole day making the house ready to use in all rooms so that we wouldn’t all be cramped in the kitchen. Whatever…

In related news… The above mentioned couple went riding today. Luckily KB and I went with them. We road the super fast (at least right now) Prospector with Church Rocks cherry stem loop. With our nice 65 degree weather, blue sky and perfect trail conditions, we couldn’t have asked for a better day. Speaking of trail conditions… the trail was perfect on the way out. On the way back we ran into speed bumps more commonly known as hoof prints. Luckily we didn’t run into the back of the things making the speed bumps, we just saw them from afar.

Then we went to Benja’s.

In news related only chronologically…

As we were cresting dump hill on the way back from the Cottonwood Trailhead, I could see what appeared to be a cyclist. It looked like they were seated but pushing with one foot common to what you will see people do when they have a broken chain. Assuming that this was the case, I began to slow down to offer the poor broken chain sucker a ride back into town, or at least offer to fix his chain. But as we approached, it became evident that my assumption was far from wrong, what we saw was the following. A grown man wearing a cycling-dork yellow rain jacket, lycra tights, helmet and camel back riding a scooter. That’s right a scooter. Not the small wheeled razor pieces of shit, but the ones we had when we were young with big wheels and brakes and stuff. So this grown man was pushing, as is the case with scooters, his way up dump hill.

Now, I’ve always believed that one should live and let live and I do not gest at this man for any reason other than it was a damn funny sight, but I can’t help but wonder if his legs are disproportionate. I mean he was out there. He wasn’t just pushing around the city streets, he was close to the apex of dump hill. If he scoots that route often it would seem logical that his pushing leg would be about twice the size of his other. Maybe I’m not up on scootering and he rotates between legs, but I don’t remember doing that as a child.

Did I mention that the Pad Thai from Benja’s is the best food ever?

Now for your quick installment of Making Cycling Difficult 101.

If you want to really get a good difficult ride in, you’ve got but one thing to do. When you build up your new bike, and then change wheels, make sure not to readjust the brake calipers. By doing this it will feel like your brakes are on all the time. Because they are.

Just one more tip to help you get through.

Two dates to remember.

Tomorrow we will be doing a shop ride. Meet at the shop at 3 or at the Green Valley parking lot around 3:15ish. We will be riding the Zen, unless I can convince everybody that the Barrel Ride is more fun, which it is, I promise.

Also, don’t forget that we will be signing the Church Rocks loop Saturday the 27th of this month. I shouldn’t take much longer than doing a slow loop around the rock. So come and have a good time riding with the Alliance and do a good deed at the same time.

Well, I would like to bring this quote to an end with me current favorite quote. This one is from Fixie Dave. Bare in mind that last night is a bit fuzzy so if it’s not an exact quotation you already have my excuse. Here ya go, “Me building wheels is like watching a retarded monkey try to hump a pumpkin.” That is some beautiful imagery. Thanks Dave.

Peace. Love and Revolution.

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