I prefer to show up late to Keg Camp.
This is highly uncharacteristic of me, but with this group and this much booze, it’s best to give my liver a fighting chance. And so, we headed to keg camp from the Lounge around 8:30 PM rolling in about an hour later. We took our camp spot on the rim, a bit away from camp so we could get some sleep if the party went later than we wanted it to. Being the prepared people that we were being, we rolled out the sleeping bags and pads. First tragedy, KB brought my pad that has a hole in it. This might be a long night, keg or not.
With a place to crash securely secured, we headed toward the noise. KB and I are well aware of the location of Keg Camp, but I’m always a bit hesitant walking into a camp where a party is clearly going on, that is until I see someone I know and am confident that I am at the right campfire. It was Ali’s voice that I heard first and we were snagged into greetings before we actually made it to the fire. While chatting with Ali, I kept hearing our names being called out from the fire. This should be fun.
The SG contingency consisted of ourselves with Kenny and Heather. Everyone else had come down from SLC area and after a long day Riding the Goose, the party was in good swing. As you can see from the above photo.
The night wore on and I soon found myself DJing the small Bluetooth speaker that was the party’s sound system. First it was Salt’N’Peppa (I have no idea how to really spell that) and then Girl Talk and a few others I hadn’t heard of but were requested. The music continued to go downhill until the dancing stopped and then we hit up some Cash, some Carll and seeing that it was Ali’s Befday, a little NOFX song entitled “Happy Birthday! You’re not special.”
In regards to that 2nd artist, the party had begun to wind down and it was KB, Rod Pathbiker, a few others and I left standing around talking music and other non-sense. It was at this point that I brought up Hayes Carll and his song “She left me for Jesus.” Of course, we immediately needed to listen to this beautiful little ditty and it was put on. After which, we spent a good half hour joking about said song and subject matter. And then Rod told KB that his wife and he were having problems. And she believed him getting all concerned and asking probing questions like, “Did she go back to the Mormon chuch?” And so it went for a few minutes until Rod couldn’t hold a straight face anymore and nailed it with, “She left me for Jesus.”
And the party started to wind down.
KB and I stumbled back to the truck where I found my sleeping pad deflated. I blew it up and crawled into my sleeping bag and passed out. About two hours later my pad was completely flat and I had to piss. I got up for said reason and then blew up my pad, again. It was amazing how comfortable everything felt with air under my ass. Unfortunately that only lasted about twenty minutes and my backside had sunk through the pad and was bouncing off the truck bed. Once my shoulders started to hurt, I would roll over pull out the mat and blow it up again. It was a long night of hell with short interjections of comfort.
The wind had been blowing but died down all night. It was a calm morning until I got up and tried to build a small fire. As soon as I tried to light some bark, the wind picked up just to make my efforts more difficult. Coffee was had and at hangover pace, the camp started to awake and get the bikes ready. The plan was to head to Little Creek for some Sunday Services aka General Conference.
The group split in two with half heading on Magic Carpet ride and the rest of us heading out on the West Loop.
The wind was howling and despite the beautiful blue day, it was a little chilly. As I was doing some testing of the Mooseknuckler Cycling Alliance Cutoff Bicycle Riding Shirt, I learned that its superior breeziness isn’t a desired trait when the wind is ripping down off the black ridge and making most people dawn arm warmers and even a couple of jackets.
The rim was interesting as the wind would gust and hit you as you rounded a corner. More than once, I was moved a couple of feet. Luckily the wind was blowing up to the mesa and thus kept us from being swept to our deaths on the rocks below. The wind was certainly the defining weather for the day. It was uttered more than once, however, that despite the wind, we were all having fun.
And then we made the obligatory stop at Kenny’s Crack.
Based on the photo evidence, Kenny was exactly 3.2cm away from being swallowed whole by a Crack Monster. Fortunately and thanks to his superior riding skills, he was able to pull up his rear wheel and smoothly transition to the other side. And then he turned left.
Which is what we did for a while after. Go over rock, turn left, go over another rock and then turn right. On occasion, there were some “stupid” lines ridden but mostly we just made our way around the mesa. By the time we hit the water fall on our way out, I was done. My legs felt like they had just finished pedaling the TFL and I was heading out for a second lap. It didn’t help that I was on the Enduro. Wrong bike for this ride, this time.
We made it back to the “trailhead” only to find Ruth and Eric had been on the mesa as well. We joined forces and had a wonderful community sit on the rocks and eat chips party. We all shared what we had learned this year at General Conference and plans were laid for next year. The time frame is as such, just when you are thinking, “Hey, when is Keg Camp?” You’ll realize that the Cactus Hugger is taking place and that will be your clue. General Conference is about to happen.
And seeing that we had shown up late, we made sure not to leave early.
P. L. and R.
