Due to my awesome camerphone picture taking skills, you can clearly see that this guy/girl/dog/transvestite is riding what appears to be a two-wheeled love machine. What those lousy 5 megapixels and tiny sensor failed to show, is that this is in fact only one step above a four-wheel coffin. Yup, you guessed it. This is a Softride…
Everybody knows that everyone needs a bicycle that acts like a catapult every time you go over a bump.
So what have I been up to? You know, beside taking kick-ass cameraphone pictures. Well, I went for a pretty awesome overnight bikepacking trip with KB. In keeping with my Making Cycling Difficult mantra, I left my bike at home and walked the whole way. This happens to be a good thing because we were headed into the Pine Valley Wilderness Area. Yup, it is close to SG and yes it is remote. Rumor has it that it sports the highest population of mountain lions per square mile anywhere in Utah.
In conjunction with that number, it also has the lowest number of retards. Again, this is a good thing because we were looking for solitude/solidarity (what’s the difference anyway?). We saw exactly four people, one horse, one dog and four goats. Goats? You may ask. Yes, goats. I’ve seen a lot of things in my day, but never pack goats.
These goats were accompanied by two pack people. I guess they were going on a trip or something.
The couple was pretty concerned about our dogs and ensured they were contained before they allowed their goats to come up the trail. Every other pack animal I have seen has been lead by a leash. So, you know, if a mountain lion or pack of dogs came around the bend, your pack animal and all your gear doesn’t go bounding down the trail without you. But what do I know, I’m just a bipedal animal that was carrying a big load.
I didn’t dare challenge them in any way because I figured they were all satanic goats that were carrying human sacrifices up the mountain. Meaning that they were leading the humans and not the other way around. \m/
We also saw a lot of green stuff and mountain stuff and open meadows and freezing temperatures and mosquitoes.
You may noticed that there is a motif with these pictures that happens to coincide with the sun. We were worshiping in hopes of a good trip.
We camped in Wipple Valley all by our lonesomes and didn’t see anyone until we were hiking back down the mountain. Did I mention that our little bikepacking trip consisted of 2000 feet of climbing in 6 miles? I didn’t, well, now you know. The trail switchbacks immediately leaving the trailhead. If it’s easy, it isn’t worth doing.
We got to the trailhead a little before dark. I hustled to get the tent set up and make some grub before it got dark. One of the first things that I noticed is that I couldn’t find my sleeping pad despite the fact that I specifically remembered putting it in my pack by the tent. Irregardless of my searching, it was not to be found. Of course, until I got home.
That little wad of fabric could have made my night a lot easier. Instead I tried to get comfortable crammed between two rocks, one for my shoulder and the other for my knee. I guess I’ll have to go again soon so I can use my pad. Yea, that sounds like a great excuse. Anyone want to join me?
One thing I did not forget to take along with me, was my newly acquired Clik Elite harness camera case. Which right now is definitely on my list of things that don’t suck. I’ve always struggled on my “bikepacking” trips with wanting to take pictures but not wanting to stop, unload the camera and then have to load it all back up again. Taking a picture could easily take 10 minutes. So I just wouldn’t take pictures unless I was really motivated to do so. Ease of access, you gotta love it. It’s like a short skirt for my camera. Thanks Fred.
In completely unrelated news that I will try to relate, I want to introduce you all to the Mooseknuckler Climbing Alliance mascot.
He’s like a giant mooseknuckle good luck charm. I won’t belay ever again without him.
I now leave you with the newest reason why I don’t like big boobs.
P. L. and R.