I’m a mechanic not a magician. I can’t turn lead into gold and I can’t fix things that you have destroyed. Nor can I turn your 8″ downhill bike into a 24 pound XC rig (on second reading, I have done this one). Water has more power to destroy a bottom bracket than my grease and rag have to resurrect it.
And I cannot put the coating back on your stanchions
With that said, I have embarked on a magical project dubbed Project Magic Works 1.0 Purple Unicorns (Editor’s note: Project Magic Works 1.0 was deemed to have the same title problems as the Mooseknuckler Cycling Alliance Social Lounge, in that it is too long and will take up too many pixels on your screen. Hence the name change).
As you may recall, the Mooseknuckler Cycling/Climbing Alliance’s workshop has been declared full. This means that no new bikes can be purchased without culling one from the heard, as Fixie would say. This isn’t so much a problem for myself as it is for KB.
We both have five bikes. This keeps our marriage in complete balance and there is no bickering over bike space. The difference is I have five usable bikes and she has 2 1/2. She has a bit of an issue of becoming attached to things and then not wanting to get rid of them. Or, as is the case with one of her bikes, purchasing something that is the wrong size and then not being able to get ride of it.
This hasn’t been too much of an issue until the Cimarron and Kathleen Epic Tour of 2012 was planned. KB declared all of her five bikes not tour ready and decided she needed a new bike. As I mentioned, she has a problem culling bikes from her heard and could not decide on one to lose. Despite the fact that she has kept her Trek road bike around with the sole intention of one day using it for a tour, but she has determined it doesn’t fit right.
This is where Purple Unicorn comes in to play. I am to take this ill fitting and barely working Trek road style cycle and turn it into a touring machine. When we first started dating I made it clear that I would never work on her old bikes, ever. Damn, another promise broken.
So I am to take this…
And turn it into this…
The patient currently has a cup and cone bb, old style handlebars and shitty old drivetrain. I have ordered a Salsa compact hbar for it. In conjunction with an adjustable stem, it should bring her bars up to comfortable-for-all-day-riding height. The cup and cone bb will have to go. I’ve already swapped out the wheels to an old set of Mavic with Shimano 600 hubs that are in good condition. These will be retensioned and the hubs rebuilt. I haven’t completely decided what to do about the drivetrain other than that I plan on replacing most of it. The frame is in relatively good shape, but I haven’t pulled the bb yet so that might change.
I have about six weeks to finish Purple Unicorn. I will be sure to keep you all posted on the developments and processes as I become a magician.
In a world full of Supermen…
P. L. and R.