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I bought a fat bike, what’s it to ya?

Fatboy-Morning-GlorySo I bought a fat bike. What’s it to ya?

I have toiled with the idea of purchasing one of these beasts for at least the last four years. There is so much sand in our area that deters one from riding to cool places, like, for example, Elephant Arch or the Yellow Knolls. Both places that I’ve hiked because I needed to get my dogs out or there happened to be 5 inches of snow on the ground. And every time I’m walking through sand I can’t help but wondering what it would be like to be able to ride these cool places.

The obvious question that is now on your mind is, “So, can you actually ride through sand?” And the answer is no. You cannot ride through the sand because the tires are so fucking big that you don’t even sink into the sand. You cannot ride through sand but you can in fact ride over the top of the sand, kind of like a desert dwelling, two wheeled love machine riding Jesus.

To be completely honest, I am blown away by what these tires will roll over. Basically, if you have the energy and power to push the pedals, it will go over it.

My first ride was home from the shop. I purchased the Fatboy on a day that I had ridden to work, so I had to ride a bike home and it’s hard to not want to ride a new bike when you have one. So my first ride was on pavement. Beside the fact that the pedals that came on the bike were total crap and the drizzling rain made my feet slip off every time I put any effort into the cranks, it was an enjoyable spin home. And having fat tires, I quickly found any and all possible side routes with sand to explore on the way.

Sunrise-from-the-Fatboy

The next morning, after spending about three hours drinking beer and taking all the parts I can’t ride off of the bike and replacing them with stuff that I like, I got up bright and early and went for a pedal. I assume that an hour and a half would be plenty of time to make it to work via the Middleton Powerline and T-bone. I was wrong.

This bike will roll over anything, but it does take some effort and power to do so. That’s a lot of mass rolling around on those tires. While I was able to roll over all the sand, loose gravel and steep climbs, I was not able to do it quickly. I was forced to bail on T-bone and ride the pavement to the shop arriving just in time to open the doors.

And I can’t wait to get back on this bike.

The office Fatboy.
The office Fatboy.

Now before you get all up in arms that I bought a fat bike and how trendy they are and how they will be the death of everything good and pure in this world, let me get to the point. Fat bikes aren’t for everyone. Some people can’t justify owning one. All in all, I might not be able to justify owning one, but I’m sure going to find out if I can or not.

The cycling industry has done a few things over the years. It’s disected the riding experience down to such a finite level that every conceivable style of pedaling has a specific bike. We all know why this is, it’s so they can sell us more bikes. If you can do everything on one bike, what’s the point of buying two, or three, or four, or five… I have no problem with owning more than a couple of bikes. I ride all my bikes, some more than others, and enjoy them all.

Selfie-on-a-cross-bike
Dig the farmer’s tan…

Case in point, this past week KB and I got out and rode a descent amount. Seeing that I didn’t feel like pedaling the Endoro, the SW SJ HT SS needed some brake work and KB was riding the XTC, I grabbed the cross bike. Skinny tires on the dirt. Pretty much the antithesis of the fat bike. And you know what, I had a fucking great time. Which is why I find the arguments on the interwebs so disturbing. There is such a divide between people who ride one type of bike as opposed to others. I just don’t get why we can’t all just get along. After all, we all want the same thing; some free time to pedal around and forget that we are all adults who have jobs and responsibilities. We all just want to play.

So yea, I bought another bike that I don’t have room for in my shed (I am currently taking bids on an addition). I rode it and it was fun. Are fat bikes for everyone? Probably not.

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Sacred Yak from The Republic of Doom on Vimeo.

But here’s the test. If you just watched that video and you thought you wanted that 4:50 of your life back. Fat bikes are probably not for you. You should steer clear of pack rafts as well.

But on the other hand, if you watched that video and loved every second of it and then jumped on Google Earth to find your next spot for an adventure. Maybe a fat bike would be a great tool to have in your shed. Either way, let’s go for a ride.

P. L. and R.

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