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A Bus and Stuff and Things and Whathaveyous

We need that bus and then a road trip.
We need that bus and then a road trip.

Shelby suggested that the Alliance needed a road trip bus. I think this suggestion was mostly out of a seller’s remorse induced nostalgic wishing that he hadn’t sold his Element tied into the fact that the new Mooseknuckler-mobile now only carries one, me. And the fact that he saw this bus, http://www.hankboughtabus.com/a-tour-of-the-bus/.

As I am here to do all of your beckon and calling and whatnot, I quickly got on to the procuring of said bus. And I was kind of hankering to do some hoboing.

With these thoughts in mind, I made it rain on Monday which happened to coincide with my day off. As I sat in this very spot staring out the window instead of typing, I could hear a desperate cry coming from the Mooseknuckler Alliance World Headquarters Bicycle Storage Facility. Upon further inspection, I found that my cross bike was so lonely, she had lost all the air in her tires and was in anguish waiting for a ride. Well it was raining, so I obliged.

I replenished her sealant, pumped up her lonely tires and made sure her saddle bag was properly stock. It was not and I spent the next 30 minutes searching through the house for a Co2 cartridge. Not that I knew there was one here, just that I couldn’t fathom that there wasn’t one here. I found one. And off I went to do some hoboing search for a van.

Did I mention it was raining? Oh right, it was raining. I quite enjoy a wet ride and this was no exception. The temps were perfect for a little moisture and the small amount of precipitation coming out of the air was just enough to dampen my clothing but plenty to keep the peeps off of the bike path.

Seeing that I was out “looking for a bus”, I naturally stopped under the overpass because that’s what people do when they are out “looking for a bus.” I guess I am a hobo because I found the hum of the tires overhead and the water rushing by to be quite peaceful.

Home Sweet Home
Home Sweet Home

As there were no other hobos under this overpass, I continued my journey.

Now what I am about to expound is going to be hard to believe, but I swear to you on the No Dabs Contest Bible that it happened.

There this Mooseknuckler was, just minding my own business, just riding along as they say and out of nowhere I see four polygamist women walking toward me.  They were clothed in their traditional garb, Wave Hairdo, long dresses, you know what I mean. It was raining and I was on a bike path. Sure, in Walmart I wouldn’t have thought twice about this scene. But picture it, a wall of polygs, in the rain, on a bike path. It still blows my mind and I witnessed it. They were the 2nd through 5th people I had seen on the path. The other person was some douche who had decided to park his jeep on said path. I informed him of his intelligence.

Anyway, there I was in front of a wall of polygs. I’m a friendly guy and I always say hi to everyone I pass on the bike path. I greeted them and they didn’t even respond. I was heartbroken. There goes that dream. Of course, I was so perplexed by the whole occurrence I didn’t even have the ability to snap a photo.

I finished up my ride and just as I was throwing in the towel on that lovely afternoon, I noticed the above photographed bus tucked away down by the river. It was perfect. It’s old. It looks like a hobo bus and I’m sure that we could get it for cheap or possible for the price of removing it from its current location.

As everyone knows, you can’t have a road trip bus without a kick ass logo to go on the side of it. Luckily, I had recently commissioned one of the Dice to create some logos. The male Dye that goes by Joey had just sent me over the copy.

This would look lovely on the side of the bus.
This would look lovely on the front of the bus.

We could get a real moose head and use it for the middle part of the logo. Of course, it would be mounted on the hood and the rest could be airbrushed around it. It’s kind of like 3D art. If you follow me. If you don’t, it’s art.

Now that the outward design is finalized, we really just need some gas money. Which reminds me that the last day to preorder these kick ass shirts is fast approaching. After the 31st of this month, you will not be able to get the Mooseknuckler edition of the SCRAM t-shirt. Plus, it provides us some gas money for this story.

Get yours while they're still available!
Get yours while they’re still available!

You really should pick one up, all the cool kids are doing it. Or don’t, whatever. Just remember, when we run out of gas, that it was all your fault. (Or steal some money from the corporate ass holes advertising on the right side of your screen by clicking the ad and then don’t buy anything…)

I think that pretty much settles it. We have a bus, we have a design and we have gas money. It’s time for a road trip.

The only thing left to do is extract current occupiers from the bus. And then figure out how to get it out of its current location and we’re set.

P. L. and R.

 

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